For so long I had you on my side and you were a person that I could run to for any reason at any time. Through one of the hardest years of my life, you were there and in return I was there for you. I always had your back and almost every time I looked behind me, you had mine too. Having you on my side sometimes felt like I could conquer anything or anyone. I don’t think you know how it felt to have you as a person that I could always call and cry to, because I didn’t know until it was gone.
I understand that life takes us many place and sometimes we can’t always take all of our belongings with us. I understand that sometimes having less real friends is better than having several fake ones. I understand that maybe our journeys may have taken us elsewhere in this life, but I always wanted you to come with me. I always wanted to have you on my team and I wanted to root for you in your accomplishments and be by your side for the failures. I wanted you standing next to me at my wedding, laughing and joking about the times when I said I’d never find love. My hope was to celebrate graduation and our accomplishments together, leaving college with a friendship stronger than before. We left our bubble and saw new things and met new people, and I had hoped that our paths would cross again. I looked forward to the days when we would be reunited on your porch, having late night heart to hearts that I could only have with you. You really knew what it looked like from my shoes.
Maybe my friendship was too much for you, I wonder. Maybe I took more from you than you did from me. I can’t help but think that I drove you away, maybe I was too needy. Anyway, if that’s the case, I’d like to say sorry. I’m sorry I kept taking from you. I’m sorry if you felt that this was a one way street and I was gaining more than you. I want you to know that I was behind you 100% and always on your side. I’m sorry if I didn’t make this clear to you through my actions and words. I’d like to think that maybe I didn’t drive you away, but this was a growing process and I just didn’t make the cut. I’d take that over screwing up our friendship any day. I’d like to thank you for our time together and I hope that someday life brings us together again.
There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t miss you, and on occasion want to pick up the phone and call you. I’d like you to know that wherever you may be, one day, when the urge hits you to call me to say hello, how are you that you are more than welcome. To me, it’s not about the time that passes, but the strength of the friendship. There are not many people in my life who I regret losing, but you really are one of them. The loss of you as a friend has impacted me greater than I ever could have imagined, and I want you to know that you are welcome back in my life whenever you need me.